Would you give a child a loaded gun?
I would hope not!
But parents think nothing of giving their children computers, tablets and smart phone that are many times more times dangerous than a single firearm. These devices if left unguarded and unmonitored can easily ruin your children’s lives or other children’s lives.
I know, I know, your thinking, “aren’t you exaggerating a little”? I wish I were.
Today with every aspect of our lives being displayed on monitors both large and small. On social networks, blogs, massive uncontrolled databases and IM chat networks.
A irresponsible person can cause victims to commit suicide, permanently ruin reputations, cause cyber bullying and permanently ruining their own lives.
If you don’t believe me look up the stories of Phoebe Prince, Ryan Patrick Halligan, Alexis Pilkington, Tyler Clementi, Megan Taylor Meier, Daani Sanders, Amanda Cummings, Grace McComas, Hope Witsell and many, many more…
The definition of Cyberbullying is when a child or teenager is harassed, humiliated, embarrassed, threatened or tormented using digital technology.
When an adult is harassing children or teenagers, it is known as cyber harassment or cyber stalking.
Cyber bullying is often a systemic attempt to get another child or teen to feel bad about him or her self through electronic communication. It usually happens more than once, and includes leaving demeaning messages on someone’s Facebook page, uploading embarrassing photos, or spreading gossip or rumors through instant messaging and text messaging.
There are a number of ways to humiliate and threaten children online. And because the damage is often psychological, and carries over into the real world, the threats posed by cyber bullying can be very real. There have been cases where cyber bullying has led to severe depression, self-harm and even suicide.
In some cases, it is possible to get law enforcement involved - especially if an adult becomes involved and brings the level of offence to cyber stalking or cyber harassment. It is vital that your child comes to you when cyber bullying takes place. It is usually possible to print the screen showing the offending action. Additionally, it is possible to trace the IP address of the user, and locate the computer from which the cyber bullying is taking place. This can help prevent further incidents.
Despite the potential damage of cyber bullying, it is alarmingly common among adolescents and teens. According to Cyber bullying statistics from the i-SAFE foundation:
1. Over half of adolescents and teens have been bullied online, and about the same number have engaged in cyber bullying.
2. More than 1 in 3 young people have experienced cyberthreats online.
3. Over 25 percent of adolescents and teens have been bullied repeatedly through their cell phones or the Internet.
4. Well over half of young people do not tell their parents when cyber bullying occurs.
The Harford County Examiner reported similarly concerning cyber bullying statistics:
1. Around half of teens have been the victims of cyber bullying
2. Only 1 in 10 teens tells a parent if they have been a cyber bully victim
3. Fewer than 1 in 5 cyber bullying incidents are reported to law enforcement
4. 1 in 10 adolescents or teens have had embarrassing or damaging pictures taken of themselves without their permission, often using cell phone cameras
5. About 1 in 5 teens have posted or sent sexually suggestive or nude pictures of themselves to others
6. Girls are somewhat more likely than boys to be involved in cyber bullying
The Cyberbullying Research Center also did a series of surveys that found these cyber bullying statistics:
1. Over 80 percent of teens use a cell phone regularly, making it the most popular form of technology and a common medium for cyber bullying
2. About half of young people have experienced some form of cyber bullying, and 10 to 20 percent experience it regularly
3. Mean, hurtful comments and spreading rumors are the most common type of cyber bullying
4. Girls are at least as likely as boys to be cyber bullies or their victims
5. Boys are more likely to be threatened by cyber bullies than girls
6. Cyber bullying affects all races
7. Cyber bullying victims are more likely to have low self-esteem and to consider suicide
Parents and teens can do some things that help reduce the cyber bullying statistics:
1. Talks to teens about cyber bullying, explaining that it is wrong and can have serious consequences. Make a rule that teens may not send mean or damaging messages, even if someone else started it, or suggestive pictures or messages or they will lose their cell phone and computer privileges for a time.
2. Encourage teens to tell an adult if cyber bullying is occurring. Tell them if they are the victims they will not be punished, and reassure them that being bullied is not their fault.
3. Teens should keep cyber bullying messages as proof that the cyber bullying is occurring. The teens' parents may want to talk to the parents of the cyber bully, to the bully's Internet or cell phone provider, and/or to the police about the messages, especially if they are threatening or sexual in nature.
4. Try blocking the person sending the messages. It may be necessary to get a new phone number or email address and to be more cautious about giving out the new number or address.
5. Teens should never tell their password to anyone except a parent, and should not write it down in a place where it could be found by others.
6. Teens should not share anything through text or instant messaging on their cell phone or the Internet that they would not want to be made public - remind teens that the person they are talking to in messages or online may not be who they think they are, and that things posted electronically may not be secure.
7. Encourage teens never to share personal information online or to meet someone they only know online.
8. Keep the computer in a shared space like the family room, and do not allow teens to have Internet access in their own rooms.
9. Encourage teens to have times when they turn off the technology, such as at family meals or after a certain time at night.
10. Parents may want to wait until high school to allow their teens to have their own email and cell phone accounts, and even then parents should still have access to the accounts.
If teens have been the victims or perpetuators of cyber bullying they may need to talk to a counselor or therapist to overcome depression or other harmful effects of cyber bullying.
Sources:
- Richard Webster, Harford County Examiner, "From cyber bullying to sexting: What on your kids' cell?" [online]
- i-SAFE Inc., "Cyber Bullying: Statistics and Tips" [online]
- Cyberbullying Research Center, "Summary of our cyberbullying research from 2004-2010" [online]
- National Crime Prevention Council, "Cyberbullying" [online]
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